Spambot Roundup

Over on Twitter, the spambots just keep coming.  I've only actually had three of them since I last blogged on this subject, and one of those wasn't really trying - what sort of a name is Coffee Edd?  But lots of fellow Tweeters have been rounding up their own spambots and herding them in my direction, so here's another collection of potentially useful names.

Troublefield 2 

Yes, despite terrible viewing figures and career-worst performances from the whole cast, maverick cop drama Troublefield has been commissioned for a second season (the producer was at Rodean and Oxford with the head of BBC1). This time around, Troublefield and Glaspie are on the trail of international villainess Velda Kjar, and Troublefield's tangled love-life gets still more tangled as he is drawn to both glamorous local nite-spot owner Harmony Dance and feisty coroner Lawanda Cavison. He's also having a love/hate relationship new partner Gillian Hirlockir, a chunky-knit Icelandic detectress on secondment from Reykjavik PD. In a surprise twist that we can all see coming from the moment the first trailer airs, the real villain turns out to be suave business tycoon Tiffin Wilson.

The Name of the Spambot

Meanwhile over on ITV, a mediaeval whodunnit is unfolding. Be-wimpled sleuth Illuminada Wordlaw, Mother Superior of Spambotte Abbey, must solve the murders of Meagan Bess and Abbigal Gray. Suspects include brown-toothed Mummerset peasants Lance Goatherd and Willow Tuf, and local widow Dolores Cull, as well as prosperous merchant Mathew Wool.  A surprise twist reveals the real villain to be none other the squire, Sir Marlin de Boursiquot.

I've also discovered that Twitter is where the producers of the James Bond films find the names for their female characters.   Future Bond Girls will include Profeta Breed, Sabina Ballard and Missy Fujisama.  Other names which might prove useful in a high octane thriller include Chaya Gorenflo,  Xiomara Sodiman, Latrizia Hinostrosa, Lilia Hydrick and Shemika Stinsir.  But possibly not Rafaela Hefti.

Thanks to all the twitterers who have sent me these.  If you use Twitter yourself, it's well worth following @TinyLocomotive @ianarchiebeck, @gilibugg, @SaffronKim @TheCCaptain @jondwill @hierath77 @bahtocancer @NosyCrow @suzebain @CTD @JulieBertagna @shmack72 @frankwkelly and @kjstansfield

Apologies if I've missed out anyone, or any good 'bot names - Twitter is an ephemeral medium, and haven't had much time this week to keep an eye on it.

I won't have much time over the coming week either, as I'm off to MicroCon at the weekend, and then to exotic Twickenham for World Book Day.  Reports on both those soon...

Hester Shaw drawn by Lindsy Silva

It's always nice when the world of Mortal Engines inspires somebody to draw or make something.  Here's a portrait of Hester Shaw by Lindsy Silva.  I like the way she's managed to make Hester look quite cool and attractive without shying away from that horrible scar.  I suspect the real Hester has flowing auburn tresses like those only in her dreams (she has problem hair as well as problem everything else) but I'm all for a bit of artistic license, and this pretty much captures the spirit of Hester in the later books. 

You can find more of Lindsy's work on Tumblr, on Deviantart (where she's known as Shenli) and follow her as @elleoser on Twitter.

MicroCon Exeter Update: Book Signing.

There's just over a week to go till MicroCon, so here's a quick word about my book-signing plans, or lack thereof.

The convention doesn't appear to have an official bookseller, although I was offered a table from which to sell copies of my various works.  I'm not sure what other guest authors will be doing, but I'd rather attend their talks and events than sit watching tumbleweed roll past while I wait for people to buy Mortal Engines, et al  - added to which, I couldn't carry very many with me on the train. (Curses! My advice to would-be authors: LEARN TO DRIVE.)

So if you are attending MicroCon, and you'd like me to sign copies of any of my books, I'll be more than happy to oblige, but you'll need to buy them in advance and bring them with you.  Most high street booksellers should have a few, including Exeter's two branches of Waterstones, and of course they're all available from internet retailers.

Even if you don't want stuff signed though, do come and say hello!

Troublefield vs the Spambots

Imagine my delight when I noticed that I, @philipreeve1, have over 700 followers on Twitter!  And then imagine my lack of delight when I noticed that about 600 of them weren't real followers at all, but pesky spambots!  How the people behind these made-up twitter accounts hope to profit by following me, I'm not entirely certain.  It's something that seems to happen to all Twitter users, and most regard it as a bit of a blight.

I'm not so sure, though.  I've noticed that, while most of these 'bots take on the outward form and semblance of pneumatic young ladies in bikinis,  a lot of them have really strange names.  Names which are almost like real names, but not quite.  The sort of names that aliens might choose if they wanted to pass unnoticed among us but knew of our culture only from really crackly and distorted audio broadcasts.  They are the sort of names, in fact, that a lazy author could usefully hoover up and give to minor characters in his next book...

So while the twitterati grumble about the torrents of spam, and suggest that Twitter adds captcha to its sign-up process to put them off, I prefer to look on these little robot followers as cogs in a massive Character Name Generator.  Here are the best ones that I've come across so far:

Braziel Troublefield was the one who started it.  He's clearly a maverick cop in one of those rubbish dramas the BBC show at 9pm on consecutive weekday nights.  He has a dour but philosophical Glaswegian DI called Glaspie, underlings named Sinion Ridders and Calvir Stoddard, and an on/off romance with sultry Tawnya Fillheart.  Troublefield is on the trail of the notorious gangster Dovie Spangitti, but in a shock third episode twist that everyone saw coming from the start, the the real villain turns out to be that suave cad Shankland Bushwell MP.

If maverick cop dramas aren't to your taste, there are also some more gothic-sounding spambots, like sweet, innocent Esmeralda Lyke and her villainous governess Clarissa Harshcape.  Will heroic Branagan Boots dash to Esmeralda's rescue? And if you prefer pure fantasy, then Lang Stonis has a good swords-and-sorcery ring to it (isn't he in The Game of Thrones?)

Best of all is the magnificent Dindy Wibs, but I'm not sure what story poor Dindy fits into: she may need to have a whole new genre constructed around her.

Further spambot character names as we get them!

With thanks to my fellow spambot-spotters @JulieBertagna @jondwill @ianmcque @frankwkelly @Afterwish and @sculduggery